AAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why oh why oh why??

Woe is me.

And everything miserable.

Never in my life have I handed in a piece of work to go in and take it back due to it being so shite.

Especially when two other massive pieces of work are due in over the next ONE WEEK!

What am I thinking? Why am I even doing this course? What is the point in all this?

I'm starting to wonder if I'll be any use to anyone if I manage to actually get through it!

I just wish I could stop these thoughts for long enough to do something useful...I don't know why I'm doing this, academia was wrong the first time round and it's still wrong now.

If I hadn't gone to uni for the sake of it where would I be now? What would I be doing? What path would I have taken?

I have actually gone to uni for the sake of it and 9 years down the line I'm still on that path of misery!!!

What did I ever want to do with my life?

I don't remember ever wanting to do anything...maybe an astronaut or something, until I found out how easily I could end up blown up.

Sometimes I wish I would get blown up.

And then I feel guilty because usually people who do get blown up really don't want to be, and neither would I if it happened to me.

This old diary is full of crap like this from uni before and now crap like this is here again.

I need to change what I'm doing.

Or change my response to it.

Which is easier?

Which is the right thing to do?

Born of Two Mothers - December 07, 2009
Academic Angst - July 14, 2009
A Squooshin' - June 25, 2009
Emerging from a Black Cloud - June 22, 2009
Neighbours who know everything - May 21, 2009